why do I care ?

In life, we often lived through a lot of familiar questions. Questions such as "are you alright ?" or perhaps "yes or no ?". Simple yet complicated questions. But mine, all started with "why do you care ?"

She is the girl that I took for granted, not once, but times. A girl that I never thought that she is important at all, maybe sometimes. But I've never thought of her feelings, never thought of anything regarding about her. Not even her favourite colours or food. The only question always wander in my mind was, "why do I care ?". However, till the day she left me, I started to learn to understand her more. I remembered her favourite colour, food, clothes and even words. I started to think about her more, each and every time I look into her Facebook, it reminds me of how much I had taken her for granted. But, she never complain, never. The problem was me, I was the one complaining and rant for days and nights. Realised but too late.

I often look at girls who are much hotter and prettier than her. I never notice her beauty before. "Why do I care?" I asked myself. One day, I lay back on my chair and realised how attractive she is to other guys. "Maybe I was wrong, totally wrong about her," I thought. Thoughts remain thoughts, I never change. Her Facebook or even Twitter were flooded with lots of guys, that time I realised how attractive she is. Realised but too late.

I often thought that she is not good enough compared to other girls. There are other girlfriends who cooked for their boyfriends or even tidy up the whole bedroom for them. I always thought that she wasn't the one that I can really love. I always thought that other girls can do better than her. I never notice her abilities at all, everything nice about her was nothing. "Why do I care?" I asked myself. One day, I had to live without her. The day I realised, who was the one who stay by my side when I am sick, who was the one who planned a surprise birthday party for me, who was the one that folded heart shapes origami, a piece a day we are together and who was the one who kept me standing when I am falling. Realised but too late.

Now, laying on my bed, typing every 26 letters on the keyboard just to tell her how much I love her. I should ask myself, "why do you care ?" on everything I typed, everything I want to tell you. Realised but too late.